Do you ever feel like giving up? Maybe it’s a task you’re working on, goal you are aiming towards or just life in general that isn’t going the way you thought. You start to think, “This is too hard. I can’t do this. Is this worth it?” And then you begin to compile the list of reasons why you should just give up.
However, only days, weeks, months, or years prior you thought to yourself with adamant resolution, I will not give up on _________ (fill in the blank).” In fact, you were motivated, fired up, and focused; there was no way you could ever imagine feeling like you would want to quit. But then you hit a rough patch and as quickly as you knew giving up was not an option, you find yourself waving a white flag of surrender.
If this is you right now or has been something you have thought in the past, look at whatever screen you are reading this on and say, “Right here sister!” You said it didn’t you?
Well if you did, I want to congratulate you on being human! The truth is even the most super human among us will feel like giving up on at least one day throughout the year (for others you may feel this way almost 365 days a year and that’s okay too).
In life there will be days when giving up will seem like the best choice out there. However, I’m here to encourage you to not give up with these 5 simple, but important reminders.
1. Acknowledge you are human
Some days in life will be better than others. There will be times when what you “feel like” doing will not help you in making it to your end goal or desired outcome. Actually, as I am writing this there are times when I want to stop, give up (oh the ironies!), check my phone, or give myself a “brain break” (aka procrastination).
Choosing to not give up can be a second by second, minute by minute, day by day choice. The human side of us tries to avoid anything unpleasant, uncomfortable or difficult. We like to avoid pain at all costs; it’s wired in us for survival. Therefore, the first thing we must do is recognize wanting to give up is a natural reaction, but pushing through during those times is crucial to get to where you want to go.
2. Take time to breathe and reset
When feeling overwhelmed, it is not the best time to make decisions about quitting something or starting something else. In fact, it’s imperative to take a moment to breathe, step back, and give yourself some space to find clarity. Take a walk, talk to a friend, go somewhere other than where you are. Many times when we take a step back from a situation we realize our most immediate response is not always the best response. Before giving up, give yourself time to breathe and become unstuck (https://christypennison.com/how-to-become-unstuck/ ).
3. Prepare and plan for things to not go according to plan
Most of us, myself included, don’t always give ourselves realistic expectations when making a big change or going towards a goal we want to accomplish. We definitely don’t plan and prepare for things to go sideways, but it is super important that we do. We need to plan and prepare for things to not to go according to plan. We need to create effective strategies to help us regroup when unexpected things come our way.
Planning for obstacles helps us shift our mindset from an all or nothing mentality to “if, when, then” thinking. For example, “When I don’t feel like writing, then I will give myself a 10 minute break to walk around outside before starting again.”
Recognizing and acknowledging that the unexpected will happen allows you to be ready for anything and pivot accordingly. Practice pivoting instead of quitting, and remember, many roads can lead to the same destination (just ask google maps).
4. Go back to your why and focus on that
In my day job as a counselor, I often encourage people to think of their why. Why is it important to practice self-care? Why is it essential to set boundaries with others? Why do you want to make a change?
Many times when we set off in a direction, we have a why behind the reason we are moving forward towards a desired outcome. For me, my “why” for blogging is to help inspire others to go forward into possibilities, growing into their full potential, and utilizing their unique strengths and abilities to create the life they want. Does this mean every day I feel like blogging…. uh no, but my passion and “why” drives me.
If you find yourself stuck and wanting to give up, just go back to “why” you started in the first place and focus on that. Knowing your why and keeping it at the forefront will propel you through the tough times that come your way.
5. “It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” Confucius
This quote by Confucius has been my motto during this new season of my life, and I am really learning to appreciate it. What I’ve learned from people who reach their end goal or finish what they set out to do is that they do not stop. They may take two steps forward and one step back, but they keep moving forward.
Developing small disciplines or habits to practice consistently helps you do this, especially when what you are aiming for seems almost impossible. Sustainable change rarely happens overnight; give yourself permission to not have to change everything at once. Jim Rohn (https://www.jimrohn.com/ ) once said, “Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day.” Taking the time to build effective habits and developing skills you need will help you go the distance.
Me finishing this blog post is proof of the things you can create when you don’t give up. And guess what? I had to do each of the things I mentioned above to get me to the finished product. Sometimes it just takes showing up with what you have and choosing to inch forward no matter what.
Wherever you are today, DO NOT GIVE UP. Do not stop even though it seems you are barely inching along. Remember, our successes are often just on the other side of our failures.
BE INSPIRED
What will you NOT give up on today? Please let me know in the comments below!
[…] How to NOT GIVE UP Even When You Want To […]